attention getting

attention getting seems most appropriate.

i've been thinking a lot about the things that happen in life. i've had some interesting conversations with people about God and how he will allow things to happen in our lives for a purpose. those conversations have also led into sometimes bad things just happen. we live in a world of sin and ickyness.

so anywho, back to the pictures..

this happened this past wednesday as i was coming home from driving through a paper route that i am doing for a friend while she gets a much deserved vacation. i was attempting to get into the left hand lane on 295 and as i looked over my shoulder to see if i could merge, the cars in front of me dramatically slowed down. as i turned back around, i plowed into the guy in front of me. going 70 mph. he went flying into the median across 2 lanes and i spun a time or 2 eventually landing on the opposite median from the guy i hit. it seemed so surreal the few seconds that this all took place. slow motion as i lost complete control of my car and was rendered powerless. i remember screaming for Jesus and cussing like a sailor all in the same breath. i remember thinking i can't die. this can't be it. i don't want to go out without fully living my life.

we called the cops. they showed up and everyone is ok. we both were able to drive away in our cars. i only have slight back and neck pain, nothing advil won't cure. i was ticketed and will be going to court. which i will gladly attend because it should have been much worse.

at the speed i was going and the force of the impact, i shouldn't have been able to walk away. i should have gotten hit as i spun down the interstate. someone was looking out for me. God had his hand on me that day. which to me is a totally humbling thought. he cares. he isn't done with me yet. theres still a purpose for me to fulfill. wow.

as i was sitting in the cops car doing the paperwork, the dispatcher came through, behind us was a 6 car pile up. the cop mentioned that most likely it was because of my wreck that caused traffic to slow down and people to not pay attention.

our sin has consequences. not that i think my accident was because of sin. i do think it was a wake up call. a forced push out of where i am and into where i should be. but the thought that my mistake causing the other wreck is an extremely difficult thing to process. i think my wreck was an attention getter. God's been trying to get my attention for awhile i think. little tests to see if i am fully ready to take on the responsibility i should have taken on long ago. i'm not sure i've done too well but this wreck has forced me to think about some things.

like what do i really want my life to look like? am i willing to wait for God's best or settle for second best? am i living an intentional life?

the following verses God has laid on my heart and has brought to my mind repeatedly the past week as i've struggled with a lot of difficult questions:

This is what the LORD says—

he who made a way through the sea,

a path through the mighty waters,
who drew out the chariots and horses,

the army and reinforcements together,

and they lay there, never to rise again,

extinguished, snuffed out like a wick:

"Forget the former things;

do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the desert

and streams in the wasteland."

Isaiah 43: 16-19